What Have I Become?
by Yiku Mitsui Briefs Jaganshi
Summary: Rated for language. This idea's kinda cliched, but it's about Vegeta sacrificing himself for the sake of Planet Earth. Songfic to "Hurt", by Nine Inch Nails. And, Johnny Cash too...RIP man!


Howdy hey to all you fic lovers out there! This is the latest work of Yiku Mitsui Briefs Jaganshi!  
  
This is a spur-of-the-moment kinda thing. It's what Vegeta's thinking before he sacrificed himself for Majin Buu. The idea's cliched, but trust me, this is different.  
  
Disclaimers: Let's clear something up.  
  
Dragonball Z: Akira Toriyama  
  
The song Hurt: Nine Inch Nails  
  
A bass guitar, ramen noodles, and this account: Me.  
  
Title: What Have I Become?  
  
[ ] Indicate song lyrics. Told in Vegeta's POV. Enjoy.  
  
[I hurt myself today,  
  
To see if I still feel.]  
  
Dammit, that kick sent me through another cliff. If I go through anymore, this could get desperate. No! I have to keep going! I have to prove that I'm better than that clown! Isn't that why you willingly went under that evil wizard's control?  
  
[I focus on the pain,  
  
The only thing that's real.]  
  
Why did I do it? Why? Was it because I was so determined to beat Kakarot, or was it another reason? Gahh!!  
  
That bastard! He must have no clue about who he's messing with. I am the strongest warrior in the whole universe, and I'm going to prove it one way or another!  
  
[The needle tears a hole,  
  
The old familiar sting.]  
  
Hah, I think that did it. It should, anyway. But, Kakarot has been known to surprise everyone, including me. No matter how much I hate to admit it, that Babidi asshole took a good amount of my energy.  
  
Shit, he's back up. There's only one way out of this one, then, and it's a damn good thing this isn't about honor. I'll have to take advantage of his merciful side. I'll have to deceive him.  
  
[Try to kill it all away,  
  
But I remember everything.]  
  
Idiot! This isn't even about honor! This is the battle you've been waiting for your whole life! Honor shouldn't even come into question when something you want is right there! This is the way it's always been, and this is any different!  
  
This is the way...I've always been...  
  
[What have I become?  
  
My sweetest friend.]  
  
After I knock the clown out, I look down at my hands in wonder. How the hell did I become this way? I can't blame Frieza anymore; that excuse is getting old. I've only to blame myself, and my stupid ignorance. But, maybe I owe my survival to my own ignorance and arrogance.  
  
[Everyone I know goes away,  
  
In the end.]  
  
I shake my head to gain my focus back on what's next: Majin Buu. That monster was obviously awakened by now; the power level's going through the roof. And I can feel that Gohan has already fallen. I'm sorry, Gohan.  
  
I blast off toward the main battle area, with one ambition in mind: To get rid of these bastards forever. But, why am I here? Why do I even give a damn about what happens to this planet anyway?  
  
Nevermind, I know why.  
  
[You could have it all,  
  
My empire of dirt.  
  
I will let you down,  
  
I will make you hurt.]  
  
~*~  
  
This battle has been going on for quite some time now. I'm still worn out from my battle with Kakarot. I'm actually ashamed that that idiot didn't finish me off when he had the chance; this fight is humiliating. I mean, I'm getting the shit beat out of me by some stupid pink marshmallow freak!  
  
[I wear this crown of shit,  
  
On my liar's chair.]  
  
No! I won't just treat this as a stupid, pointless battle! I have to survive, because I can still die! No matter how stupid I think this is, that doesn't get me out of it!  
  
[Full of broken thoughts,  
  
I cannot repair.]  
  
But, then again, why do I care whether I die or not? I've already accomplished what I wanted to: I defeated Kakarot. Isn't that what my purpose was? Wasn't that why I was born into this shitty universe anyway?  
  
[Beneath the stain of time,  
  
The feeling disappears.]  
  
Since I'm laying here almost half-dead anyway, I finally realize why I am here, why I'm striving only to survive, why I'm so determined to defeat this maniac.  
  
It's because of her.  
  
[You are someone else,  
  
I am still right here.]  
  
Bulma. That crazy blue-haired woman is the only reason that I haven't blown up this miserable planet myself. Her, and my son. I wouldn't trade them for anything, even if offered immortality. But, I suppose I forgot that somewhere along the line.  
  
[What have I become?  
  
My sweetest friend.]  
  
Have I been lying to myself this whole time? I was raised to only love superior things: power, greed, authority. I had no one to tell me otherwise. The people who taught me how to love otherwise, were Bulma and Trunks.  
  
But, maybe I'm lying to myself right now. Maybe I shouldn't be worried about other people, and just worried about how the hell I'll get out of this.  
  
[Everyone I know,  
  
Goes away in the end.]  
  
I can feel myself being freed from my bindings, as I roll over about five times. I can hear people talking to me, but they're children's voices. Wait...Trunks?  
  
"That's right, Goten, he's a prince! A prince! And there's no way a prince could lose to a pink idiot!"  
  
I open my eyes and look up at the smiling faces of my son, and Kakarot's son. "Trunks, my son..." I manage to get out.  
  
I bolt up as I search for Majin Buu. I then look down at the boys, but quickly look back at the location of the monster.  
  
[You could have it all,  
  
My empire of dirt.]  
  
I look down at my son, whom I had to knock out. He and Goten would've stayed throughout the whole battle and gotten killed had I not. Although, I don't regret holding hum like I did, no matter how much he may when he's older. Oh well, it's up to the woman to raise him now.  
  
[I will let you down...]  
  
"You stay! You fight!" the glutton yells at me when he notices Piccolo fly away with the two boys.  
  
"That's right! You're fight is with me!" I yell back at him.  
  
As the fool is deciding what to turn me into when I die, I scoff. "You are a fool", I say. "I am going to crush you, and throw you into the wind."  
  
[I will make you hurt...]  
  
I begin to power up, only a premonition of my next, and final act. Trunks, Bulma, I do this for you. Yes, even you, Kakarot.  
  
[If I could start again...]  
  
I yell a strong battle cry as I push my own power to its maximum. I can feel the oaf's power vanish into nothing. But, that doesn't mean that my work is done yet. I made a decision to do this. It's for the best.  
  
Trunks, you will grow up to be a fine warrior one day. Listen to your mother, and don't follow in your father's footsteps. I'm not the great, honorable warrior you seem to think that I am. I'm sorry to have disappointed you.  
  
[A million miles away...]  
  
Kakarot, you are truly my greatest adversary. Whenever I have accomplished something, my rejoice is cut short by the realization that you've passed that milestone already. But, other than my worst rival, you were...my best friend.  
  
[I would keep myself...]  
  
And Bulma, I'm sorry that I cannot be there. When you find out, I know that you will cry. But, don't cry because you think you've lost your husband. If there was one word that I'd be able to say to make you feel at ease, I'd say it a thousand times. Although I'll never admit it, I love you.  
  
I'm sorry that it had to come to this. If I could live my life differently, if could only have seen what pain I've been causing myself and others, then maybe I wouldn't have made the decisions that I've had to.  
  
I'm sorry.  
  
[I would find a way.]  
  
--End!  
  
Okay, I know that Vegeta was kinda OOC, but I'm sorry.  
  
^^ Please review!  
  
[Yiku sama] 


End file.
